Tales of Carrion Mansion- Episode 1. {Authors note: This series has grown so much that I have now given it an umbrella title.}

Warning. Do not read if you are under 18 years of age. This
is complete fantasy, it has never happened, is not happening
now and will probably never happen. If you are a kid looking
for baby-sitter tormenting ideas then run, do not walk over
to your library.

Elvira Peterson and the Witch's kids.

By Skytower

Part one: The Magic Feather

Elvira slowed her moped to a stop and looked, her mind
taking in the scene. It was just before sunset, with a chill
evening wind working it's way through her jacket. Freshly
dead leaves, blown by the wind hit against the wrought iron
fence, then lay still. The house beyond the fence was semi
Victorian in style, a cross between the House of the Seven
Gables and the house they had used in the last Addams Family
movie. It even had a widows walk on the roof.
A little voice in her head told Elvira to turn around, a
weekend spent in this place would be a weekend in hell. But
if she turned around there would be no babysitting fee. No
babysitting fee and there would be no hockey camp next
summer. For a moment Elvira's ambition to play in the NHL
combated with her common sense. Ambition won out and she
edged her moped toward the gate. It opened with an ominous,
stopping her short.
"Great," she said softly, "another haunted house."
Then she saw an electric eye to her left and relaxed.
The front door had no bell, just two gargoyle head
knockers. They stared at her as Elvira knocked. After a
minute the door swung open, revealing a very tall crimson
haired woman dressed in a clinging green gown. Elvira
craned her neck, looking up and up. If this was Mrs.
Carrion her mother had not been exaggerating. The woman
looked to be almost seven feet tall, with a slim figure and
bright green eyes.
"I am Lilith Carrion, may I help you?"
"Uh, yea, I'm Elvira. I'm here to babysit for the
weekend."
"Please come in." the woman said. Her thin, blood red lips
turned down in what might have been a frown. The rest of
the face was equaly pleasent and frightening. Arched
eyebrows, very thin, over an aquiline nose and all of it
on the palest skin Elvira had ever seen. The woman gave
the impression of a rose, with the thorns highlighted rather
than hidden. "Are you sure you are Elvira Peterson? You look
nothing like the picture my son showed me."
"Picture?"
Going over to an end table Mrs. Carrion took an 8x10 glossy
and handed it too her. Elvira looked and wondered suddenly
if this wasn't some sort of joke. The woman in the picture
was tall, with a large boufaunt for a hairdo, and a black
dress that barely covered any of her. Especially her
cleavage. Elvira herself was only five feet four inches,
with soft brown hair and a sort-of slim figure. The only thing she
shared with the woman in the picture was their names.
"This is Elvira, Mistress of the Dark." she explained.
"I'm Elvira Peterson. Didn't my mother tell you?"
"I believe she tried too." Mrs. Carrion said, a
distressed look coming over her face. "But the hair dryer
made our talk difficult."
"Oh." Elvira said. Her mother worked in a beauty salon
and distorted conversations were all to common. Once a high
school senior had come to take her to the prom, even though
she was only ten at the time. A dominatrix had shown up at
her 12th birthday party.
"Mother where is Elvira?"
Elvira looked up to see a boy and a girl at the top of
the stairs. Twins. They looked a lot like their mother, red
hair, the boys cut short, the girls going down to her waste.
Their faces were almond shaped, with the most striking
feature dark green eyes. She was wearing a green dress that
mimicked her mother, he was wearing a pair of jeans and an
Elvira T-shirt. Each had the pale skin that seemed to run in the family.
"There has been a mistake Jeremy." Mrs. Carrion said.
"The Elvira you have told me off is not the Elvira Mrs.
Peterson recommended. This is Elvira Peterson, you shall
have to make do with her."
"Her!" Jeremy and his sister came down the stairs.
"Look at her mother, she barely has any bust at all!"
Instinctively Elvira looked down. She was wearing a
grey long sleeve danskin top, and it did tend to make her
breast look smaller. Beyond that she was wearing a grey and
black skirt with a wide leather belt and grey boots.
And I bet he doesn't like those either, she thought.
"So what were you gonna do, stare at my chest all
night?"
"Yea." the girl said, giggling.
"Helga." Mrs. Carrion said sharply, glancing at her
watch. Now listen children, this may not have been what you
wanted, but arrangements have been made. Now Elvira will
watch you this weekend, and I want you to be civil. Is that
understood?" Both children nodded, though Jeremy still gave
Elvira a disagreeable look. "Here are the numbers where I can be
reached." she handed Elvira a small book. "You will be
staying in the guest room." She turned back to the children,
gave each of them a quick kiss and was gone. For a moment
the three of them looked at each other, then Elvira hoisted
her backpack over her shoulder.
"Where's the guestroom?"

After putting her backpack in the guest room, a large
room with a private bathroom, Elvira called her mother and
told her she was safe. By that time Jeremy and Helga had
vanished. Mrs. Carrion had made a list of things the
children had to do, with times they had to do them. At six
pm diner. Finding the kitchen, Elvira pulled some canned
Ravioli out of the cabinet and nuked it in the microwave.
Then she set out in search of Helga and Jeremy.
The corridors of Carrion Mansion were tall, lit by hanging
lamps that were either gas or badly wired electric. The flickered
and did not light the hallways and passages, they merely defined the
shadows. Dark wood panneling helped, as did the Victorean red velevet
wallpaper. As she walked Elvira had the feeling she should be carrying a
candle and wearing a gauzy nightgown.
"Jeremy! Helga!" she called out, trying to shake the
feeling. For a moment there was no response, then part of
the wall opened beside her. Elvira's heart jumped for a
moment before Helga stepped out. She had changed from the
green dress into a NASA style jumpsuit. Her name was
stencilled onto the right breast.
"Jeremy's in the lab."
"Thanks." Elvira said, looking at the wall. It had
sealed itself and there was no trace of a seam or crack.
"Guess there's a lot of secret passages in this place."
"Lots, and some of them are really dangerous."
"They are huh?" Elvira asked, recognizing the tone in
Helga's voice. Time to scare the baby-sitter, she thought.
"Yea, especially the one that leads to the dungeon."
"Let me guess, that's where your last baby-sitter is."
"Nope, Jeremy turned him into a statue."
"A statue."
"Yep, we stuck him in the attic."
"So what's in the dungeon?"
"The baby-sitter before the baby-sitter who's in the
attick. Ever since Jeremy cast a spell over her she likes it
down there."
"So your brothers a warlock or something?"
"Yea, and he's a good one so you better be nice to him."
"Hey, he's nice to me, I'm nice to him." If he isn't
nice to me he's toast, Elvira added silently.
"Would you like to see him?"
"Uh, yea. Dinners ready."
"Very well, come with me." she started to walk and
Elvira followed.
"How come we aren't taking the secret passage?"
"Your too big for that one. We'll take this one."
They had stopped beside an old suit of armor. Elvira
looked around, but saw no sign of a door.
"They really hide these things don't they." she mused,
running her hand along the wall.
"You just have to know where to look." Helga said,
taking hold of the armored suits sword she twisted it.
Instead of the wall opening Elvira felt the floor vanish
beneath them. With a loud scream she and Helga vanished into
the darkness.

They landed on a large foam mattress. Helga bounced off
casually, leaving her baby-sitter gasping for air.
"You could have told me." Elvira muttered hoarsely. She
looked around, impressed at the lab. It was a large room,
filled with test tubes, beakers, and other equipment she
couldn't hope to identify. The walls were lined with shelves
filled with small bottles. Either the kid really was some
sort of mad scientist, or Jeremy and Helga had gone through a
lot of trouble to fool her. Jeremy, still dressed in jeans
and a t shirt bent over a table halfway across the room.
Getting up Elvira walked over to him. "What do you do down
here?"
"Things beyond your limmited comprehension." the boy said,
attaching some wires to a barbie doll that lay on the table.
"Playing with dolls? Yea, I'd never understand that."
"He's not playing." Helga said, handing her brother a
small probe. "He's going to bring Lucrectia to life."
"Oh, ok. Well he can do that after we eat."
"Eat? I'm conducting a serious experiment and you want
me to eat?"
"Yea," Elvira took a step closer to him, using her
greater height to force him back a step, "I want you to eat.
You got a problem with that?"
"Someday I'll be bigger than you, then you won't be so
tough."
"Look me up in a few years then, for now lets eat."
"We might as well brother." Helga said, looking up from
one of the dials. "It'll be tomorrow before the power levels
are high enough."
"Irrelevant, I'm..."
"Getting ready for dinner." Elvira interrupted him,
stepping between him and the doll.
"I suggest you be nicer to me," Jeremy looked her over,
pausing at her chest, "I am no one to be trifled with."
"You keep staring at my breast you'll be no one at all."
Elvira snapped. "Like it or not kid I'm in charge here."
"Very well." Jeremy said, though his tone made it clear
the discussion was not over. He put a cloth over the doll.
"I hope you've made something suitable."

"Ravioli?" Jeremy's tone of voice suggested that his
baby-sitter was trying to poison him. "How dare you feed me
that!"
"You don't like it." Elvira said, leaning back in her
chair. This kid was pushing the envelope.
"Of course I don't." he pushed the plate away from the
table and stood up. "Didn't mother give you any instructions
at all?"
"Yea, dinner at 6, bed at 830, breakfast at six. No
parties, no..."
"Bed at 830?" Helga looked up from her now empty plate.
"But we'll miss the X-files."
"Sorry kid, that's what's on the schedule. Don't worry
I'll tape it."
"I will not submit to this." Jeremy announced sitting
down. "It is bad enough that mother put you in charge, but
these rules..."
"Are the rules." Elvira interrupted, getting up and
walking over to him. Again she towered over the boy
scientist. "And if you don't follow them I'll make sure you
go to bed long before 830! Got it?"
"No." he snarled, standing up on his chair. "I turned
the last baby-sitter to stone, what am I going to do with
you? A frog? A snail? Perhaps," the boy looked down at
her, "a spider."
"Oh yea, you really know magic." Elvira climbed on the
table and looked down at him. "Don't make me laugh!"
A light came into Jeremy's eye, a light that both
startled and froze Elvira. Suddenly she couldn't move.
"Laughter it is then." Jeremy shouted. He jumped from
the chair, caught hold of the chandelier and climbed from it
into a trap door in the ceiling.
As soon as he was gone Elvira found she could move
again.
"Your gonna get it." Helga said, her mouth full of food.
"Yea right. What's he gonna do?"
Helga made no reply, but her giggling sent a shiver down
Elvira's back.

It was nearly an hour before Jeremy reappeared at the
door. Elvira kept Helga at the table, fearing the girl would
slip away as well. She had no desire to start looking for
Jeremy. With all the passages in the old house it could take
days. Elvira still wasn't sure why she hadn't grabbed the
punk. Could he really know magic? Or had it been some sort
of hypnosis? But kids had hypnotized her before and it hadn't
felt like that.
"Your still here." Jeremy said, walking into the room.
He was holding a mason jar with a white feather in it.
"I applaud your courage if not your intelligence."
"Thank you Lex Luthor. Start eating kid, or I'll put you to
bed right now."
"I don't think so." he smiled. "Penna Titilare Elvira!"
With that he opened the jar and the feather flew out as
if it was wired. Elvira jumped out of her chair as it came
toward her, only to have it swoop in like some hungry
mosquito. It hit her stomach and started to tickle.
"Hey!" Elvira yelled, reaching for the feather. It
slipped out of her hand like quicksilver and moved under her
arms. "Stop it!" she yelled, starting to laugh. The feather
didn't stop, it just kept moving. Elvira grabbed at it, but
kept missing. And laughing. She tried to run away, but the
feather dived under her skirt and tickled her legs. She
tripped and fell. Rolling on the floor laughing she lifted
her skirt, trying to get at it. It evaded her and sneaked
under her belt. Franticly she unhooked the belt, but the
feather simply dove into her top. Laughing hysterically she
pulled it off. It was no use though. The feather just kept
moving and tickling.
Suddenly it was over, and the feather hovered above her
stomach. Elvira became aware of Helga's laughter, high
pitched girlish giggling, and Jeremy's Vincent Price like
chuckles. She climbed to her feet, the feather followed her.
She clutched her skirt to keep it up with one hand and tried
to cover her breast with the other. The top had needed no
bra, and her bare breast rose up and down. Elvira had always
felt a little self conscious about her breast. They were a
little small, and the areola were extra large, with the tips
of the nipples exaggerated knobs.
"I believe your power over us is no more." Jeremy said,
walking over to the table and sitting down. "Now here is the
way it is going to work; I will give commands, you will carry
them out."
"Forget it!" Elvira snapped.
Instantly the feather was on her again. Above her
laughter she could here Helga urging it on.
"When you call me; Master, the tickling will stop."
Jeremy announced.
Elvira tried to run but the feather tickled her and she
lost the grip on her skirt. It fell and tangled around her
legs, tripping her. She kicked it off and got to her feet.
All the time the feather was relentless, ready for any
opening and moving at lightning speed.
Elvira ran toward the door. It shut in her face. She
made a run at Jeremy but the feather caught and tickled her
until she tripped, landing at his feet. Rolling under the
table Elvira grabbed the table cloth and pulled, trying to
cover herself and block the feather. She got a few seconds
of relief before the feather squirmed under the sheet. Again
she tried to run, only to be tripped by Helga.
With a yell of glee the girl grabbed Elvira's legs and
twisted them, forcing her on her stomach. Then she sat on
the back of Elvira's knees. Elvira started to rise, but the
feather attacked her sides again, while Helga started to
tickle her feet. In vain she squirmed and twisted, all the
while laughing hysterically.
Finally she was too weak from laughing to even try and
push the feather away.
"Stop!" she moaned. "Please!"
"Stop what?" Helga demanded.
"Master." Elvira moaned. The feather and the girl
stopped and she caught her breath.
"Very good." Jeremy said sagely. Helga jumped up and
danced around laughing. "Now you shall go into the kitchen
and prepare me a proper meal. You will find a list of my
choosing on the refrigerator." Stop." Jeremy commanded as
Elvira reached for her cloths. "In punishment for your
defiance you will not wear anything but what you have on
now."
The battle had left her with only her boots and a pair
of brown underwear.
"Pervert." Elvira whispered. Again the feather
attacked, and it kept on attacking until she cried out an
apology. Then it followed her into the kitchen.

Once in the kitchen Elvira tried to come to terms with
what was going on.
She had been attacked by a magic feather.
Impossible, she told herself.
Then what happened?
She looked at the feather, hovering a few feet away.
I was attacked by a magic feather, Elvira admitted. And
Helga, she added. As a baby-sitter Elvira had learned to
handle a lot of strange situations. She had after all babysitted
for some of the freakiest families around. In her time Elvira
had been tied up, hypnotized and she'd been tickled before,
though rarely. Elvira had a love/hate relationship with
tickling, she loved to have it done in the right time and
place, and she loved doing it, in the right time and place.
But outside of that time and place it was her one weak spot.
Bud and Kelly had found it the last time she had babysat
them, and it had been sheer torture. But nothing, not even
Bud and Kelly had prepared her for this. Locks she could
pick, ropes she could squirm out of, but how could she fight
magic?
Jeremy's preferred food was a french dish that Elvira
couldn't even pronounce, but at least the instructions were
clear. Suddenly she tried slicing the feather with a knife,
but she missed and once more was tickled. Falling to the
floor Elvira laughed hysterically until Jeremy's voice came
from nowhere.
"Do not try that again."
The feather retreated and Elvira went back to making the
meal. Not only could she hear Helga's laughter, but Elvira
could have sword the feather was laughing at her as well.

The meal set, Elvira wheeled it into the dining room and
placed the plate infront of Jeremy. He was sipping a glass
of wine.
"Can I get dressed now?"
"No." Jeremy said. "Your not much to look at but you are a
nice diversion. Just stand there and be silent."
A flash bulb startled her. As the stars cleared Elvira
looked up to see Helga watching the Polaroid fade into
existence.
Great, she thought. Another kid with a picture of me
topless.
"Wine." Jeremy ordered.
Sighing Elvira picked up the bottle and filled the
glass. She started to hand it to him, then stopped.
"What are you waiting for?" Jeremy demanded.
"Nothing." Elvira said, pouring the contents of the
glass over the feather. It wilted instantly and fell to the
floor.
"No!" Jeremy screamed. "Run Helga!"
He pulled the handle of his chair and both chair and boy
vanished into the floor. Helga made a run for the door, but
Elvira launched herself over the table and tackled the girl.
They wrestled and Elvira came out on top. Pinning the girl
on her stomach the baby-sitter pulled off Helga's sneakers.
"So you like to laugh huh?"

[It's not over yet, soon Elvira will learn it's not a
good idea to get a junior warlock/mad scientist mad, and even
less of a good idea to tickle his sister.]

NEXT