Enter
the Imp
By
Abashful1
Mr. Mxyzptlk was in a grumpy
mood. It seemed like forever
since he had been able to have any fun. Imps were far longer lived than humans,
so what would be huge chunks of our lives was nothing to him, but *this*
was ridiculous. All work and
no play was making Myx a very dull and grumpy imp.
What few beings outside the Fifth Dimension
knew was that Mr. Mxyzptlk was actually a being of great responsibility there.
He was almost a superhero to the people of his home
dimension. His trips to the
Third Dimension in fact were only done on 90 day intervals due to his busy
work schedule, not the alignment of inter dimensional forces as Superman
had believed. Myx loved his
trips there though as they were like a vacation to
him. No one was more surprised
than he when his *job* forced an unscheduled stop there.
For what Earth folks would have called two
years, energy from the Fifth Dimension and been leaking into the Third; barely
a trickle at first, but steadily
growing. It wasn't that this
energy loss would have ill effects in his home
realm. It was that the energy
and especially the acceleration of its flow would eventually cause irreparable
damage to a lower plane of existence like the Third
Dimension. Tracking the problem
had kept Myx so busy that he had missed several vacations, but ironically
if he had taken time off he would have solved his
problem.
Once he arrived on Earth, Myx could sense
the energy all around him. He
could see that a large percentage of the world's population had been exposed
to it. He could feel hundreds
of sites world wide that were just bleeding energy and nearly a billion people
had so far been heavily contaminated.
As he started looking into the problem, he sensed the site where the
flow had started from; a small lab in a STAR Labs office in a Midwest
town. The lab was not in use anymore, but this was definitely
where the problem started. Myx
could sense the presence of a familiar playmate nearby and thought "She must
be trying to solve the same problem I
am. Maybe I can get her to help
and have some fun too." A wicked grin framed the imps face as he popped off looking
for both help and comic relief.
Myx appeared over a seedy street corner not
two blocks from the lab. Under
a blue street lamp leaking some of the vary extra dimensional power he was
following stood his quarry, but even Myx could not believe his
eyes. There stood Supergirl
in the sluttiest clothes and makeup he could
imagine. As she happily smoked
her cigarette men propositioned her and *she
accepted*! "Man, this is better
than one of my jokes." Myx said to himself.
After watching Supergirl finish with the men
who had just paid for her expert services, Myx popped in on the former heroine
"Hey Super Babe! How's
tricks? No pun
intended." He said with a
wink.
Linda just looked the strange floating little
man over for a second before approaching him and purring "My,
my! Such a cute little
Meta. Well, I'm expensive, but
I think you will find me well worth the
money." Linda wasted no time
showing him the goods as she posed seductively for him and gently stroked
his hardening penis through his pants.
"No, no
Supergirl. I need you in super
heroine mode, not as the streetwalker poster
child. Come on, change the duds
and let's get moving. I might still get some joke time with your stiff cousin
if we fix this up quick enough."
The imp pointed up at the street lamp as he spoke.
Linda gave him a look like he was absolutely
nuts. "Look baby, I can play
superhero, cop, naughty nurse or whatever floats your boat, but before we
look for a stiff *anything* lets see some money first."
"Supes!" Myx said "You act like you don't
know me. After all the good
times we have had, surely you remember your old pal Mr.
Mxyzptlk?"
Linda just drew out a cigarette and lit it
before she laughed in his face.
"Look Myx, I have had 'good times' with half the
Midwest. I'm the most popular
piece of ass for over a hundred miles.
If I fucked you a hundred times, you wouldn't stick out in my
memory. So are we going to fuck or not?"
Myx could see that she was saturated with
the energy and obviously it had been used to overwrite her old heroine self
with the new whore that stood before
him. As he started to turn her
down he thought 'Hey, what the hell?
Like she will be in the mood for this after I set things
right.' Myx produced enough
cash to keep the super slut working on him for several hours.
The next day, Myx set off to find other heroes
and heroines. Without exception
everyone he found were contaminated with huge amounts of the
energy. Every woman was a whore
and every man was in line waiting to pork one of
them. Wonder Woman, Powergirl,
Zatanna, Batgirl... It didn't matter.
They were all whores.
Incredibly fantastic whores to be sure, but whores none the
less. He was even more surprised
at how Mary Marvel had fit in so well at the Keystone City Casino and
Bordello. He 'investigated'
her new slutty lifestyle for even longer than he did
Supergirl's. The only woman
that wasn't converted to prostitution was Lois Lane who he was surprised
to find as the JLA's press secretary and the Elongated Man's favorite slut
on the side.
Myx spent long days and nights investigating
the heroes and heroines. Well,
*mostly* the heroines. He
investigated Wonder Woman and Powergirl three times a
piece. Big Barda was a lot of
fun too, but that's another story. When not 'testing the bounds of their contamination',
the Idol of Millions of Imps checked out the factories that churned out the
mind controlling devices and the casino/brothels, where he went through a
whole lot of money. Almost every
police station had the same mind numbing lighting as the casinos... even
the FBI and JLA. Nobody batted
an eye at the illegal operations.
From what Myx saw, he couldn't see why anyone would have had a problem
with them even without the extra dimensional programming, but this world
was *so* stuffy that it was amazing that no one was out for blood over
this.
Having had his fun with the darling babes
formerly of the ranks of heroes, Myx finally thought 'Hey, where's Super
Stick in the Mud! Even *he* isn't raising a
fuss. Even with Lois deep throating
a human super ball everyday!' Myx
had been so busy mixing business and pleasure that he had forgotten his favorite
straight man. With a little
concentration, Myx sensed him at a casino in
LA. As quick as thought, Myx
popped in invisibly on his old sparring
partner.
Myx almost
fainted! Then he laughed until he
cried. Here was the mighty Man
of Steel dressed in a black fishnet tee shirt, skin tight black leather pants,
and a dog collar proudly tagged as 'Madam's
Toy'. It wasn't too hard to
figure out who Madam was either.
Superman hovered behind her like a love sick puppy, always guarding
her like a zealous worshipper. Of
course, she was a total babe and he could see why most guys would love to
be her slut-toy, but she wasn't close to Wonder Babe's
league. Lois's either. Still,
this Madam loved to demonstrate her command of the
hero. She was almost constantly
caressing the man's most erogenous zones and frequently inviting public displays
of devotion. Myx followed the
couple for the better part of a day.
She frequently had her Super Slave carry her from establishment to
establishment. She spent half
her day checking out her illegal operations and the other half meeting with
authorities corrupted by her mind
control. At the end of the day,
she met with her number one aide, Mistress
Judith.
Although Supes was the Merry Madam's favorite,
Judith was obviously the force behind her
success. This woman had a devotion to her work that impressed even
Myx. It seemed like Judith would
not be happy until her Madam ruled heaven and hell
too. Myx had finally seen
enough. He decided a very private
powwow with the good Madam was in order.
The Merry Madam was quick to notice Judith's
fixed stare and unresponsiveness.
Even before Myx began talking, she knew something was wrong "So you
are the new designer of this run down dimension" the imp
began. "Gotta say I like what
you did with the place, but you have to know that it has to go back, right?'
The Madam knew that time had stopped for all
in the room but she and her unwanted
caller. "So, you must be Mr
... ummm... I'm sorry, but this is your name,
right? Could you pronounce it
for me?" She swiveled a flat
screen monitor his way with the word Kltpzyxm on it.
The imp smirked at her. "Nice try, but I'm
sure your files don't say I'm stupid.
The name is Mr. Mxyzptlk, but you can call me
Myx. Besides, since I am here
on business, that little trick holds no power on me."
"Hmmm... Business is
it?" The Madam purred as she
pressed a button on the console.
Immediately four figures shimmered into existence and the JLA teleporters
brought some of her prized employees into the room. The former Mary Marvel,
Wonder Woman, Power Girl, and Supergirl all smiled and cooed enticing greetings
to their recent playmate. The
girls looked at each other and giggled as they exchanged knowing
looks. The Madam smiled at Myx and said "I have to admit, I love
your job and your work ethic. If
you are *really* in the mood to get something done, I can call the other
20 tarts you drilled this week."
Like Judith and Superman, the working girls
all froze in place too. "Not
tonight darlin, but thanks for the offer." Myx replied, but he was mostly
business now. "Look, I have
spent time watching what you have gotten done in the last two
years. You have improved things
over all. Wars are the last
things on people's minds and so is violent
crime. In fact the streets are
safer than they have been in over a
century.
Bravo. But here is the
bad news. In about 50 years,
your dimension is going to implode if we don't stop the flow of the energy
you are using soon. Then you
and every one here is toast. It's
not a threat and if you read your files, you know I don't do
punishment. It is just the way
reality is on the dimensional scale.
I have to set things right before I go."
Myx soon learned that his adversary was more
than able to defend her position.
"If I can believe you, I could understand why we would have to stop
using the blue light devices, but I think things are *already* pretty damned
right. Last month my 'corrupted'
heroes and villains kicked Darkseid's gravel ass back to Apokolips in record
time. We wiped out three quarters
of his armies, including his elite.
Would the JLA have done that
before? You know how any human
lives were lost in that invasion?
*None*! There is less poverty
world wide now too. You know
why? Because I send seed money
there and have the heroes and villains secretly work on their infrastructure
there. Someday they will be
some of my best customers. Why
does *that* have to end?"
"Sorry Babe." Myx
answered. "You put up a good
argument, but an Imp has to do what an Imp has to do." And with that, a blinding
flash of light washed the room away for the Merry
Madam. For a second she felt
like she was floating in a calm sea of contentment, but only for a
second. As the feeling passed,
the Madam's eyes snapped open with a
start. She was still in an opulent
office; however the panoramic views were
gone. In fact, there were no
windows at but if anything her computers and security equipment were far
better. Judith, Superman, and
all her working girls were gone.
Only she and an evilly smiling imp
remain. Through her shock the
Merry Madam growled "What have you done?
Where is everyone else?"
"What I did is fix the situation!" Myx
chuckled. "And all your employees
are closer than you think." The
5th dimensional wizard pointed at her wall of security
monitors. To the Madam's horror,
every hero, heroine, and villain she had under her control a few minutes
ago were pouring into the building.
Not only that, Judith and the Amazons were holding the doors open
and getting everyone into position.
Never before had she felt so
afraid. The villains would surly
kill her, but would the victimized heroes even try to
help. As the Madam's jaw dropped,
Myx put a hand on her shoulder and said "No use delaying
it. It is time to face the
music."
After a minute of reviewing her thin hopes
of survival, she picked herself out of the chair and moved to face her destiny
with courage. 'I have had a great run.
I was even the most powerful person on the planet for a
while. If this is the end, then
damn it I am not going to go out shaking in my
boots." Bravely the Merry Madam
strolled out into the very gaming floor that Supergirl had been corrupted
on and faced the scores of people she had once bent to her
will. The former heroines were
all dressed in their old uniforms; former villainess as
well. When she was a third of
the way across the room, she heard Supergirl shout "Ok everyone...
NOW!" All in unison the entire
group joined together as one to show this evil woman exactly what they thought
of her. All present began singing
"For She's a Jolly Good Fellow".
The Madam thought she was going to have a
heart attack! Her confusion
and surprise were almost too much for even her to
bear. Then everyone in the room
froze in place. She surveyed the room and saw Superman sneaking into her
office with thier favorite play toys.
Mary Marvel and Big Barda were
smoking. Powergirl had her hand
in Batman's pants. She even
caught a glimpse of something coming out of Elastic Man's pants cuff and
snaking its way up a very happy Lois Lane's skirt which was completely unnoticed
by his wife standing on his other side.
The Madam turned to a laughing Myx with a puzzled look. He responded
"Had you going there! The look
on your face was *priceless*. OK,
I *fixed* the place. That doesn't
mean I set it back the way it was.
I replaced your blue lights with something as good but more dimensionally
friendly." The imp held up his
left hand which was covered with a gauntlet encrusted with 6 glowing
gems. "This isn't the only universe
I work in. I took this from
a mook called Thanos and replaced it with some inferior trinket I made with
this beauty. Anyway, your tech
guy has a big enough supply to keep you in whammy lights for at least a
year. Also there are some other
changes. The heroines, heroes,
and villains still are your slaves, but they all still act their old selves
when they are not on shift with you.
A few hours a day they rescue folks, avert disasters, and save humanity
just like they always did; but when no one is looking, they make a bee line
to their real job with you. That
goes double for Big Blue." The
madam looked disappointed but Myx continued "Trust me, as much as you had
him around before, even a super roll in the hay gets
old. It will be better this
way."
Something occurred to the Madam and she quickly
checked the crowd. Every Amazon
except for Wonder Woman was still dressed as an
employee. Some as madams, some as call girls, some even as street
walkers; yet not one was dressed in their old garb like the
heroines. She asked her new
friend "Why are the Amazons still dressed like whores?"
"You know, I tried to turn them back" the
imp stated while scratching his head "but Zeus was quite clear in his
orders. He basically said no
redos for them. He warned them
and they screwed the pooch. Well
now they will screw anything and Hera doesn't know it yet, but he has been
slipping down here to have his fun with them as
well. I guess it pays to be
the patron deity of horn dogs." Myx smiled and asked "Isn't there something else you want
to ask?"
She tried to think of what he was talking
about. When Myx pointed up at
the blue lights above she realized what he was talking
about. "The supplies you gave my tech support... how do I keep
in supply?
Myx winked as he brought the crowd back to
life. He locked his arms around
the very willing Mary Marvel and Big Barda and said "I think we can work
*something* out."
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